Tuesday, 8 January 2013

Ridiculous clothing

I have these memories of when I was a kid. My Dad looking after my brother and I when we were small. He would do the gardening and we would be outside playing or helping. I use the word helping in the loosest sense.

In my memory the weather is chilly perhaps Autumn and my brother and I are dressed to combat the cold, probably in mittens the type with string that runs around the back and down the arms and a bobble hat. However the piece de resistance to really keep out the cold was our all in one waterproof suits which we literally had to be zipped into.

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02376/onesie_2376928b.jpg


Yes, these kept us warm and dry but it had one major drawback. It must have taken Dad quite a time to get us ready to get outside, and then within about ten minutes of hitting the fresh air one of us would need the toilet. Going to the toilet whilst wearing these was not an easy job. It was quite an exercise to get us disrobed, into the toilet and then dressed again for the garden.

It is with thoughts of those damp afternoons that I look at the new fashion craze that seems to be sweeping the nation. The so called 'onesie'. As far as I understand this is simply a babygrow for adults. Someone I was talking to today received one for Christmas. It is apparently Christmas themed. I plucked up courage and asked the question, "Is it a pain when you want to go to the toilet?" The reply. A resounding yes.

I've done some research. There are retailers on line that specialise in these outfits. The pictures of people wearing them are not generally flattering. You can buy them with tails and ears so you look lie a cat. They come in tiger print, cow print, covered in sheep and you can even have your America embroidered on the front.

How the hell did this happen? How did it become fashionable to wear these items? Some people even go out in public in them. All that's needed now is a pattern of two wolves baying at the moon printed on one and I might consider wishing the Mayan prophecy was correct last month.

God help us all.

 

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