The dentist

I can't say that the dentist is one of my favourite places. I understand that dentists are generally nice enough people and obviously have a job to do, it's not the dentists themselves that I have a problem with its just going to the dentist.

To be honest I have never really had to worry too much about the dentist. When I was a kid I needed a small filling in one of my milk teeth but it was nothing much and if I remember the tooth fell out pretty soon after. I didn't need any other work and my wisdom teeth, although sometimes emerge and are a tiny bit painful have not resulted in any dentist ever suggesting that they might need removing.

It's just that I have not always trusted the dentist. They look at your teeth and then say things like, you have a whole coming there...you will need to watch it. It might be better if I fill it now, would you like a white filling, that will be £800. Or I can do a temporary filling now and can you come back next week and I will take the temporary one out and replace it with a more expensive one, etc.

http://apexdocuments.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/dentist2.jpg

In the olden days there was just the dentist (and a fish tank) but now there are dentists, dental nurses, hygienists and orthodontists. I and my family are on the NHS patient list for the dentist so a visit is relatively cheap, however the dentist then suggests that I make an appointment to see the hygienist who charges per visit and will obviously expect me to make more than one appointment, the cost starts to rise...

The sound and smell of the dentist is fine, I even like the taste of the pink water and the sound of the drain as you spit into it. The thing I don't like about the dentist is more related to the hygienist.

When your teeth get cleaned the cleaning brush uses water to lubricate and help remove the tarter. Also stuck in your mouth is a drain, a pipe that uses suction to remove this water and stop you from drowning. This pipe never seems to work. Usually it sticks to the side of your mouth or tongue so all that it sucks is the inside of your cheek. As a result the water is not removed and starts to pool at the back of your throat; this results in involuntary swallowing and you start gulping like a frog, all the time the hygienist is telling you to relax and is waxing lyrical about the benefits of dental floss, whilst you are silently choking to death.

http://www.onlinedentist.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/2009-05-30__h05.jpg

Once cleaned your teeth don't feel like your own, they feel sharp and if you are not careful you could slice your tongue or worse someone might mistake you for a vampire.

Today I had no stress as I was just at the dentist as an observer at my kids appointment and I was able to sit back and watch as the dentist called out the numbers 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 1, 2, 3 etc. However I was disappointed that I didn't get to taste the pink water or get a spiderman sticker for being good!

http://moviesmedia.ign.com/movies/image/object/041/041073/spider-man2_pole_468.jpg

Comments

  1. Anonymous20 August 2012 at 23:08

    I wish I hadn't read this I've got the dentist on Wed and always feel a sense of dread before I go.....you've just reminded me of some of the reasons why!!

    ReplyDelete

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